[ad_1]
anger wells up within us when we realize that we have been wronged, but how we deal with the situation will determine whether the problem is resolved or intensified. Here are 10 ways to solve the toxic condition
As you work through them, not just read them and consider the extent to which one applies to you and the situation you find yourself in a Try focus on. each tip one at a time, perhaps remembering the current one every time an angry situation threatens – like who will become routine
1. Take a deep breath … wait … take a few more …
Breathing calms the body, and by reducing the physical symptoms of anger, calms the mind. When something has angered you, rather than erupt spontaneously, or sending off an angry letter or email, breathe deeply and then exhale – and exhalation should be longer and more complete the in-breath (eg seven seconds and beyond ten). Repeat this several times and continue until you are physically calm. Only then should you express yourself verbally. If you can not calm down, consider what benefits you are trying to get out of the situation, and take a measured, considered action that does not ranting or send invective-filled or vitriolic email or letter that can only inflame and worsen the already fraught situation. Consider importantly, what you want the ultimate result to be?
2. Do not deny anger ……….. but consider the consequences
Anger should not be suppressed. Storage anger builds only more explosive later. It is best to “use it and lose it” – ie release anger, do not lose your temper. Anger can be used appropriate or inappropriate. It is appropriate when you use it to achieve the desired result. It is inappropriate when anger uses you, takes over and able to unconsidered and unwanted result. Think about the poor service at the airline, did not explode hostess – ranting and raving will just annoy other passengers and can you just not allowed to use that airline in the future – rather call the senior purser and voice a complaint in a measured way and you are likely to be offer a better meal, upgrade, or maybe even air-miles. I’m talking from a very recent personal experience, by the way!
3. Eat right and drink wisely ….
Healthy but not too eat, drink lots of water, avoiding enjoy tea, coffee and alcohol, but not beyond all rational response to irrational emotions or fatigue. They can also prevent and manage stress headaches. We all know people who are so much worse for wear when the alcohol kicks in -. To limit and end were enrolled to stand on the ground just before you become aggressive and unpleasant drunk
4. Article fatigue and stress
One of the most common places we recognize that we are tired and / or stressed in the car. This is where most arguments between spouses or companions occur. Kindle may not be the best route, high traffic or poor control of another driver. The consequences of losing your temper can be unbearable journey or worse, an accident. You could harm someone, kill or be killed. Rather deep breath and wait. Above all, do not drive when tired. You may want to make a conscious decision to let the driver to be in charge and determined not to “back seat driving” or be “Prat NAV”!
Fatigue and stress are equally insidious at work and at home. Rather than arriving in a major argument, say you are upset and walk away. Again, you have to learn to recognize what your button will cause you to react angrily – when you know your triggers, you are well on your way to control you and your mood
5 .. Control environment website
As anger specialist Mike Fisher * says, “Anger thrives in a toxic environment, feeding on itself. If you manage to keep quiet at work or in the car, others will be less stressed and angry, which will in turn help you need control your anger. ” If necessary, take a time out and remove yourself from a place of dispute temporarily. Step out for some fresh air if at all possible, or at some other type of diversionary day.
6. Anger justified response to wrong-doing should be proportionate
There are times and situations when it is absolutely right to be angry, but when, for example, one goes into a rant because one of your employees has fallen and smashed glass, this is excessive. On the other hand, become apoplectic at a fraction of a valuable antique vase is not unjustified! However, it will not help those responsible for that, certainly, feeling pretty bad without help from you.
7. Focus on the issue rather than the person
When we are angry it is easy to use terms like “you always get it wrong when you talk to customers”, but this has the potential to bring about a response like, “no, I do not always, just in this case, but you always say always !! “With a focus on issues such as:” Mrs Jones was upset – do you think you could have gone in another way? ” will produce a very different and less emotional reactions. Do not try to generalize if you must vent your anger.
8. Get help
If you are constantly stressed and angry state at the expense of your health, well-being and relationships with others, is it really wise to seek help from a doctor, therapist or coach. Help can come in the form of advice, medication or suggestion for life-style changes, but someone else is far more likely to see the bigger picture. Just take that first step to get you some help, will be a positive step.
9. Join a support group
An example would be The British Association of Anger Management or AA, or your place of worship – a church, mosque or synagogue people. Joining meditation, yoga or tai-chi group often provides a stimulating community to deal with lower-level stress.
10. Take responsibility
A problem could be caused by another person or situation, but until you recognize that the greater problem of a lot of your response to the negative situation rests with you rather than the other, you are unlikely to improve the situation. As soon as you start to blame others, focus on your own errors or misconceptions that have prevailed in the picture, and take responsibility. This is especially valid if angry outburst has exacerbated the situation
It is in your mind and in your hands
* Recommended reading:.! “Beating Anger ‘Mike Fisher, director of the British Association of Anger Management
[ad_2]