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If you live long enough you will experience conflict. The possibility that everyone will like us or get us very low. Inevitably, we disagree with someone. When this happens, handling conflict with smooth heads avoid stress and keeps the possibility of increasing conflict less likely.
Handling conflict need not be confrontational in the classic sense. When someone mentions the conflict we think of Showdown at OK Corral. Coming into the meeting ready to fight is not the best way to win the conflict.
Conflicts can occur at any time. You might be in a grocery store and the cashier may act rude as they ring up groceries. We’ve all had it happen at least once, right? The first reaction is to slam money on the table or click back to them. In this moment we have taken their problems as our own and create a stressful situation that changes the tone of the rest of our day.
here are five tips for handling conflict. They work for coworkers, family, friends and even strangers. You never know when the right response to the conflict could save your life or someone else’s.
1. Think about the situation. We are quick to respond when someone says that we do not like. Take the time to breathe before you answer. In the spirit replay those words.
2. Make the hard decision. In many cases, the conflict that arises is not the first of its kind. Strong or offensive words or actions could be a recurring theme in the relationship. Determine whether this partnership is worth saving or if it’s time to cut the man loose. Leaving links lead to lost friendships, divorce or changing jobs. Sometimes, for our own sake, these are better in the long run than stay in a bad relationship.
3. Wait a day. Do not answer right then. Take time to talk over the situation with a trusted friend. Maybe you overreacted. Sometimes, a third party can see something that you missed in the heat of anger. In these cases, apologize if necessary. If consensus is that you were wronged, then submit the matter to the attention of the other party with a level head not a hot one.
4. Find a solution. Common conflicts, especially among spouses could be due to wanting to buy it is not enough for. Instead of brooding, come up with favorable solutions that might get you what you want or need. Get a second job to make money.
5. Apologies if you were in the wrong. Just because something is true does not mean it has to say. To tell someone that they are wearing a dress that is too small for them is not a positive way to help them lose weight. Understand how it could be offensive to them and apologize. Better yet, stop and think before you respond in such situations. Put yourself in the shoes of the other person before hand. Part of the settlement is to realize our role in it.
Looking confrontational situations is not easy. But, it is not inevitable and sometimes it has to do. Learning conflict resolution techniques can reduce the stress of this situation.
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writer by Gregg Zban